7 Things You THOUGHT You Did Better While Drunk
Is anything really better when you use a drink to take the edge off? We addicts and alcoholics seem to think while sober we lack some much needed ingredient to successfully perform just about anything sometimes. However, if we just add a little bit of this then we can definitely do that! Regardless of whatever that is, we usually develop a belief that it will be easier, more enjoyable, and turn out better as long as we include the right amount (or sometimes much more) of our secret weapon- the drink or drug. In my experience there were plenty of things I felt required some level of substance abuse to even be accomplished, and anything else I added a substance to would only turn out better. What I found out once these addictions were removed and I practiced activities in recovery, was that less is more, and sober is much better. This is a list of 7 things you thought you did better while drunk. Brace yourself; some of this may come as a surprise. Others not so much, but hopefully it helps you take a good look at what kind of changes sobriety will bring to these avenues of your life.
This one may not be too surprising because most people openly admit they don’t do their best Brittany Spears impersonation either way. But if you’re honest with yourself, you may recall plenty of times while drinking you dared to dream big, and God help us if it was karaoke night.
Again, it may be easier to accept that you were not expecting to be admired for your dance skills. That being said, when you had a couple drinks and if you’re like me, the temptation of busting your best move is far too good to pass up. After all, who can resist a stumble in your two step.
My strategy for studying was simple. Answer a question and reward myself with a drink- or five. Obviously math was not my best subject, and after a few correct answers the rest of the home work probably did not turn out to well either. In my mind a few drinks made me an academic genius! No answers escaped me, and the more I decided were correct, the more I got to drink. However, I found out my teachers did not appreciate my learning curve.
All those drunken driving commercials are not designed to be a buzz kill, who knew? The truth is, this is actually a serious oversight when it comes to how drinking can affect us, and too often we convince ourselves that we can handle the road. Our impaired state is too much to really concentrate and perform on the road. But if we tend to get lucky a few times, we assume we have better coordination than average. Even then, anyone unfortunate enough to be in the car with us can tell this is not the case.
Some call it ‘confidence in a bottle’ and a lot of alcoholics rely on it as the only way to truly communicate. We think we have some great revelation when under the influence, and anxiety and insecurity is smothered with a few sips. We think we are so much better to be around, but truthfully most people don’t even know what we are saying, how we stay standing, and sometimes who we even are.
This one if for those of you that show up at the Christmas Party for the open bar. Some days at any job are harder to get through than others. Some of us feel a little more productive when we bring some kick in our coffee. We think we are masters of multi-tasking, taking action, and leadership. Really, we just are wasting time-clock coming up with clever names for every work day like Martini Monday, Tequila Tuesday, Whiskey Wednesday, etc.
I don’t know about you, but when I was drinking I thought I was a smooth operator! Or at least I pretend to be, usually when I didn’t think anyone was looking. But like a wise man once said, 60% of the time it works every time! When I was drinking I probably liked to think it was 100% of the time, but it’s kind of hard to wink when you can barely see straight. Waking up with text messages sent to your ex is never the best strategy, and slurs make it hard to say a good pick-up line.
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