Alcoholics don’t spend a lot of time thinking about what’s really going on.  They put themselves in a state of denial and fogginess on purpose.  Thinking, planning, understanding, making change - all of these things take effort and put you at risk for getting hurt or disappointed.  Sadly, this also means that many family problems persist and flourish.  The opportunity to make things better is right there, but the alcoholic turns away from it.  Put yourself in the shoes of an alcoholic.  What important things are you not thinking about?

Ignoring Feelings About Family Conflict With Alcoholism

You have a really uncomfortable feeling when you get together with family.  Things used to be OK, but now you end up fighting with someone every time.  All you know is that they seem to hate you.  Just that feeling is enough to avoid going or drink up before you go.  All you want to do is make that sick feeling go away.

Unfortunately, that sick feeling is something that would probably provide a clue about your family relationships.  When you quickly ignore and cover that feeling, you purposely turn away useful information about getting along with your family.  Even if your family has done a lot to hurt you, these clues can tell you a lot about other relationships in your life.  You are likely to repeat similar mistakes with other people if you push away your uncomfortable feelings.

Alcoholism Makes You Less Effective Parent

Your kids are fighting with each other again.  Nothing ticks you off more than hearing them scream and hit each other.  Seems like it’s every day now and no amount of punishment does anything.  Sometimes you ground them for a week, other times you just don’t want to even deal with it.  Either way, you know a few drinks takes the edge off the noise.

If your kids are screaming and hitting each other, they need help.  Their growing brains and muscles don’t always do the right thing.  They have trouble handling big feelings, they snap too quickly, and they do things that don’t make sense.  With you being drunk or giving harsh punishments, your kids learn nothing about getting along.  They simply learn that they are in trouble a lot.  This is a pretty good recipe for more family trouble down the road.

Alcohol Treatment Teaches You To Face Feelings and Learn

Alcoholism is a serious problem, one that most likely needs alcohol treatment.  Being drunk most of the time makes you intolerable to uncomfortable but normal feelings.  These feelings are important clues about making things work better in your life.  If you can’t understand these clues well, then alcohol treatment can help you learn.  Alcohol rehab counselors help you understand that you can face your feelings and still be OK.  When you face your feelings, you can learn from them.  That’s one of the first steps of developing a healthy sober life.

The story of Diane Schuler is so tragic.  She killed eight people including herself in a wild wrong-way highway collision back in July.  The official reports say she had a high blood alcohol level, undigested alcohol in her blood, and high levels of an ingredient in marijuana.  Diane’s husband vehemently disagrees with these conclusions.  We don’t know the whole story right now, but this story begs the question - can drug addiction or alcoholism really stay hidden?

Untreated High Functioning Alcoholic Will Still Pay A Price

This whole situation has become highly controversial.  Just a little internet research on forums and blogs showed me differing opinions from public figures and everyday people leaving comments.  Some people think the facts don’t add up, some believe it points to alcoholism and drug abuse.  I’m not writing this to take a definite stand right now.  I want to focus on the bigger picture, the not so obvious alcoholic.

If a person is alcoholic, one thing is certain.  No matter how high functioning they are, their untreated alcoholic body will show the damaging effects in some way.  No matter how good their job is, their untreated alcoholism will eventually affect their circulatory system, their immune system, their liver, or other internal organs.  No matter how well spoken they are, their untreated alcoholism will eventually make their body pay a steep price including death.

Was Diane Schuler an alcoholic in hiding?  It is certainly possible, but we don’t have the whole story yet.  Perhaps, if it is true, it will take some time for the family stories to come out and complete the picture.  Or, evidence and stories that point to a different explanation may come to light.  Either way, it highlights a truth about addiction very clearly.  Some people can be alcoholics even if they don’t fit the low-functioning stereotype.

Alcohol Rehab The Next Step Toward Sobriety

Regardless of the outcome of the Diane Schuler story, I hope you come away with something important here.  Alcoholics can come in all shapes and sizes.  Drinking excessively and fairly regularly is your tip-off no matter how put together the person may seem.  Alcohol rehab is probably the last thing on their mind, and they have the perfect reasoning.  They aren’t homeless and jobless, right?  So the denial can be even stronger than the more typical alcoholic.

If you recognize that you have a high functioning alcoholic in your home or in your life, don’t let it keep slipping under the radar.   Get together some good facts about alcoholism and be ready to talk about the impact their drinking has on relationships.  This is where the alcoholism will hit them first.  Alcohol treatment can help an alcoholic get sober and keep their important relationships intact.  And if you know all of this is true about your loved one, don’t sweep it under the rug anymore.  Talk to them about alcohol rehab and encourage them to take the first step to sobriety.

When you’re doing something you aren’t proud of or you know will cause trouble, you often try to hide it.  Or, you gloss over it like it’s no big deal, like it’s really more normal than it appears.  You might think this is working, but people can see through this.  Not everyone can, but some will.  They’ll ask questions and probe and make you uncomfortable.  So think a minute, do you have something you’re trying to hide or cover up?

You Have Handy Excuses For Your Drinking

You had a hard day at work, is it a crime to relax in the evening with a drink?  Your doctor told you to have wine every evening to help your heart.  You feel so much happier when you’ve been drinking, and you’re pretty sure everyone likes you better that way.  They all sound like good reasons to drink, and simple explanations to why you often seem to have a drink in your hand.  The excuses may get you through the moment, but they cover up the bigger pattern of your alcoholic drinking.

Your Alcoholic Behaviors And Strong Emotions Are Justified

When you get mean, make threats, or behave badly because of your drinking, you’ve crossed the line.  This is no longer social drinking or relaxation we’re talking about here.  You need alcohol treatment because you keep your drinking more sacred than your relationships and your good reputation.  Alcohol heightens emotions and makes them stronger (in most cases) than what’s reasonable or expected in most situations. Without the ability to reign them in and use logic to make decisions, alcohol can cause you to act out of line or put yourself in harm’s way.

You Drink Heavily Only In Social Settings

Alcoholics get drunk alone, not when they’re social - at least that’s what you tell yourself.  You believe that when you are at a party, you’re supposed  to drink and everyone understands people having a good time.  If you dranka lot by yourself, you would understand someone being concerned.  Unfortunately, it doesn’t matter whether a person drinks in excess alone or with others.  Excess is excess, and a person doing excessive drinking often needs alcohol treatment to keep their life on track.

Alcohol Treatment Helps You Come Out Of Hiding

If you see some of your rationale for your heavy drinking listed above, it’s a sign you may need to consider alcohol rehab.  Probably, you don’t think you have a problem.  You might just need to start by recognizing that it’s not healthy to worm around something serious like that.  Anyone making that many excuses about something that significantly affects your body and brain is hiding the truth from themselves.  If this is your reality, please consider alcohol treatment today.

The Spring Break scene, bars on Saturday nights, all-night parties during the summer - they all seem like the party goers are having loads of fun.  But there’s one thing you can count on in these scenarios - risky behaviors.  Alcohol abuse and alcoholism are closely tied with more risk taking.

Spring Break and Excessive Drinking

Daytona Beach in March.  All kinds of guys and girls coming together from all over the country.  It’s a few days of drinking, sun, and whatever else comes their way.  That nice guy your friend met on the beach when you were drinking double margaritas decides he wants to get lucky tonight.  Your friend’s early welcoming nature (due to the drinking) makes it easy for him to get close quickly.

When your friend is drunk later that night, he pushes for sex and your friend is caught off guard, virtually defenseless.  Would she have been so accommodating to this strange guy if she’d been sober?  Not likely.  She’d have maybe talked a while but kept her awareness up for anything suspicious.  It’s a dream vacation turned into a nightmare because of excessive drinking.

Aggression In A Bar On Saturday Night

A bunch of friends walk into their favorite bar.  They mind their own business, have some drinks, and start up some games of pool.  After a few hours of drinking, things start to get rowdy.  A younger group of guys comes over and wants to use their table.  The group who established their spot at the bar has become quite drunk and starts defending their territory.

In a matter of seconds, strong words become punches and kicks.  A few of the men end up getting badly hurt and need treatment at the hospital. Three men and one woman are arrested for assault.  Maybe if they were sober or had only one drink, the younger group might have joined the older group for a friendly pool challenge.  With excessive drinking, the night ends with cop cars and ambulances.

All Weekend Summer Parties On The Lake

Parties on the lake sound so relaxing.  Boats, food, sun, drinking - sounds like the perfect weekend.  But take a closer look at the risk involved.  Excessive drinking near water can easily lead to drowning.  If someone is drunk or nearly unconscious, they can drown in only a few inches of water.   Swimming while drunk or even just getting lost and falling in the water while drunk can be so dangerous.

Parties on the lake also mean that some people managing their boats could be drunk.  It’s as dangerous as drunk driving, but many people don’t seem to treat it the same way.  So many deaths and accidents on bodies of water are related to alcohol use.  It may all seem like fun in the sun, but excessive drinking by the water can make you ignore your better judgment.

Is Your Alcohol Use Excessive

Alcohol is common at social gatherings, so not all alcohol use is addictive or dangerous.  However, it’s important to know how much risk you invite  when you drink.  If you know that you have put yourself in dangerous situations when you’ve drank heavily, you might need alcohol rehab to protect your life.

Alcohol rehab may seem like the least cool thing possible at a time when you should be letting loose.  But what happens if you dismiss alcohol treatment and really put your life at risk when you’re drunk?  Is it worth the idea of having a party lifestyle to understand that you may get seriously hurt or even die?  Alcohol rehab can be a lifesaver for someone who drinks too much.  It can help restore good judgement, good decision
making, and being OK with being sober.

Women process life in ways that are different from men.  The little details, the social connections, and the communication between important people in her life all make a difference.  When these get seriously out of balance, a lot of emotional pain can flood a woman’s mind, heart, and soul.  Sometimes, drugs and alcohol are used to manage this pain.

Creative Commons License photo credit: fleecetraveler

Women Are Wired For Emotion

You could say that a woman is wired to interact with the world through emotional connections.  Certain parts of the female brain that control emotions have much greater activity and interconnectivity than the male brain.  It doesn’t mean that women are cookie cutter copies of each other that all react the same way.  Inherited personality traits, childhood circumstances, physical health, and many other things affect exactly how a woman perceives and connects with the world around her.  But generally speaking, emotion is a large part of a woman’s experience with the world.

Teen Girl Becomes Woman With Alcoholism

Here is an example of how a teen girl can develop into an alcoholic needing alcohol rehab.  A young teen girl had some verbal and emotional abuse from her childhood, mostly from her father.  She developed a thick skin and put on a tough act.  She also experimented with drugs and alcohol as a way to get some attention and escape the constant negativity at home.  After she graduated from high school and left home, she moved in with friends and did more partying.

By now, drinking was part of her identity and a way to get together with guys.  She tended to make quick hookups and get girlfriend status with controlling guys.  It seemed flattering at first, affection and attention
she never got from her father.  But before long, she felt those old painful emotions again.  Negativity, self doubt, being berated and ridiculed, being told she was stupid - it was like her childhood all over again.  She managed to break up with the guy, go on strong drinking binges to cope with the loss, then found a new sweet talking controlling guy to get cozy with.

She thought she would find someone better than the last guy.  But because of her addiction and the kind of men she focused on, her old pain continued and grew with time.  As the series of relationships went on and on, she began drinking heavily all the time.  She felt despair and a loss of hope of ever feeling loved by a man.  Her emotional pain pressed down on her like a bar od lead, leading her to drink herself into oblivion every single day.

What started as a way to cover up the pain of a verbally and emotionally abusive father turned into a way of dealing with all romantic relationships and friendships.  Her main social activity was drinking with friends.  Her main avenue for finding guys to date was around drinking situations.  She dragged all the pain from the past into the present moment every day, and had even more pain to cover up than she did from the start.

Alcohol Rehab For Women Is Specialized

If this woman were to go to alcohol rehab, she would have many layers of emotional pain and self protection to move through.  She would need to recognize how the alcoholism seeped into all of her important social relationships.  In alcohol rehab, she would learn how to connect with women in healthy supportive ways.  Perhaps her mother was gone or didn’t spend much time with her.  This woman can begin to understand how healthy relationships can help her deal with the painful ones.

This is how a woman can become addicted to alcohol - through an emotional pathway.  An alcohol rehab for women would understand how to help her through the tangled web of emotions, relationships, and self worth.  An alcohol rehab for women is the place for any woman needing help with a lot of pain and an alcohol addiction.